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KristinSnowden.com Support Community

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24-72 hour Honesty Rule

Have any of you used this successfully? I was reading that this should be done ONLY after a disclosure session. We are not into that level, my husband has only been sober 3 weeks.

He travels for work, and he is in recovery. I want to ask him if, while on the road, he purchased alcohol. Is that a good idea? I'm torn between being supportive with his recovery, and trying to stay close to our agreement we worked out so he can stay in the house during his recovery.

Any experience you have would help me....

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Hi Mariann, I love that you are seeking community and asking these important questions. Unfortunately this current community is slowly rebuilding from a previously shut down (by my Wix website host) so day by day it’s adding more members. Regarding the 24 hour rule you’ll hear a lot of different opinions. Some use that right away, some use that while they’re working things out in couples work post FTD. Some don’t use it at all. I think it’s more about what you need to feel safe and what’s working for you. You’re welcome to ask your husband any questions you want. If you feel like it’ll escalate then maybe these questions are best done in front of a couples therapist who’s also qualified and experienced in working in betrayal trauma and addiction recovery. I hope this helps.

Support on when to quit revisiting the hurtful memories

I'm working hard on stopping the need to revisit information that confirmed my suspicions. On one hand, I want to revisit them so I don't forget or minimize the pain it caused. On the other hand, my partner is in recovery and I want to allow him to fulfill his commitment to growth without me being traumatized by the memories.

Does anyone have experience they can share?

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These are such great shares and questions. Mariann, do you have a betrayed partners groups or an Alanon/Sanon/Prodependence group you can continue to explore these tough questions with? You’re at the beginning of the healing/recovery process so I want to make sure you have a space to regularly ask these questions to a knowledgeable, supportive group.

DreeaDreea

seeking support

Hi Everyone,


I am hoping to connect with someone who has gone trough what I am going through. I have been married for 8 years and we were together for 7 years before that. Over the last year and a half I found out my husband not only cheated before we got married but also after. He has cheated on me over ten times, mostly escorts and one night stands. He also went on a work trip when I was 8 months pregnant with our second child and ended up getting a separate room from his friend and had a three day affair. There has been so much lying, gaslighting and manipulating. I don't even know who the man is. Were both 37 and have a 5 year old and 4 year old. Has anyone stayed and worked through it and been successful? I can't even describe the feelings that…

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Hi dreea. Thank you for your vulnerability and reaching out. Since this is a very new community it’s taking a little bit to launch it and get everyone signed up and connected. But I promise you’re not alone.

Kristin Minto Snowden
June 7, 2026 · updated the description of the group.

Licensed Therapist

Welcome! This is a free online community for those seeking support, clarity, resources, and more while navigating relationship crisis. IMPORTANT REMINDER: All members here are vulnerable and sharing sensitive information. Its imperative that we all work to keep this community safe, respectful, and balanced.


In this space, you can connect with other members, provide and receive relevant resources and more.


Please email Kristin Snowden directly with any questions, concerns, or issues kristinsnowdenmft@gmail.com

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